Friday, August 25, 2017

My Neighbors

My heart is so heavy... I'm starting to wonder if my eyes will ever be dry again.

I grew up next to the Butlers, and I love all of them. Neighbors are such influential people.

Well, we are much older now.
Me, Adam, Aaron.
It's hard to communicate just how much I admired and adored them. But I'm just a drop in the pond; they've been the same thing to literally thousands of people. I'm one of many who admire and care about them. They influence my life in so many ways. I often recite the names of the Butler children, just to prove to myself, in my old age, that I can remember things. (Shannon, Shane, Quinn, Nathan, Andy, Chad, Aaron, Adam).

I remember watching Randy load up all their motorcycles to go camping. He was our bishop and family friend. There were countless times he plowed out our driveway after a big snowstorm... I still remember some of the great talks he gave as a member of the stake presidency. I would drive cars from "up north" to his dealership in Monticello. He was always playing or wrestling with his boys.

Laura would bring us their leftover dye from Easter eggs every year. She was my beloved Young Women leader who perfectly balanced fun and organization and spirituality. Seeing what she would come up with for parade floats was never disappointing. She is such a classy lady, a pillar in the community. Maybe when I'm her age I'll finally be able to run up to and around Lloyd's Lake like she does (every day) juuuuust once. Everyone loves Laura Butler.

The older Butlers grew up fast, but some of them still babysat me from time to time. The Annual Neighborhood Summer BBQ the Butlers hosted was a favorite summer activity. Nathan taught me to close my bedroom door at night; he showed me how this protected me in case of a fire and how to feel the door before you touch the handle (if it's hot, don't open it!). It was always a blast to watch/listen to Andy play the drums. There is a vivid memory of Chad watching the slow-motion fight in Lion King in ultra-slow motion and laughing hysterically. We still have Shannon's first music CD, which was beautiful.

Aaron, Adam, me

Everyone remembers Aaron's athletic triumphs and soldier successes, but my deepest memories go before that, before we all grew up and went separate ways. Adam and Aaron were the ones I hung out with the most.

Aaron and me, like four million years ago...
With Caitlin and Caleb and Trevor, we local neighborhood kids had all kinds of fun. I'd go swimming with Adam and Aaron; they would have the most brilliant haunted houses set up in their basement during Halloween; we'd bike around the dentist office parking lot or pet the slimy salamanders and stray kittens they trapped in their backyard or jump on the tramp or rake leaves into the biggest piles we could...
Fun fall leaves
Paul, Trevor, Adam, Aaron, Caitlin, me.

Indoor picnics = Monticello wind-free!
Caleb and Caitlin Frost, Aaron and Adam Butler, me.

Lots of Monticello Jr. 3rd Warders!

Adam: the only one who climbed the tree successfully.
(Aaron didn't even need to show off here. We all knew he could climb a tree blindfolded...)

Aaron  always was a daredevil. He would do the most insane stunts. And he was definitely stubborn determined! Wheelies on a tiny little bicycle and endless PoGo stick bounces evolved to wheelies on motorcycles and back-flips off of everything. Whether he was 6 years old or 13 years old or 20 years old, it never changed! He was always looking for a challenge, and he became a leader as he grew up. Whenever I picture Aaron, I see him right at the front of everything. In his obituary, he is called "the tip of the spear". I cannot think of a more appropriate metaphor for Aaron Butler.

Aaron, Jesse, Adam, me.

How I ache for his family this week.

Adam Butler and I did thousands of things together... such great friends. Out of my 25 years of life, we've been friends for 23 of those. He's one of the most fantastic people I know, and he just lost his brother. I'm so sorry, Adam.
Adam Butler :)

Thank you for being such a good friend for so long. I am so sorry you lost your brother. I wish I could take that hurt away, I wish I could make all this disappear for you. But because you and your family are so strong, and your testimonies in the Plan of Salvation and our wonderful Savior are so powerful, I know that you will be okay. I know you can get through this. Don't forget that you have many, many people who care about you and want to help you. Many prayers have been offered for you, and many more will continue to be offered.

When we were probably 3 or 4 years old, Adam and I would sit on
our respective sides of the fence just to chat at the end of the day.
Adam's on the right side, I'm on the left. One of my favorite pictures.

I hate it when bad things happen to good people. I dread it when terrible and tragic things happen to great people. The Butlers are all really great people. They truly exemplify the commandment to "love your neighbor as yourself," and they did this even before Aaron literally died for his country. What a Christ-like example to us all. I hope I can help my community like they have. I hope I can raise children like they did. I hope I can love others the way they do. I hope, someday, to be a neighbor like the Butlers were to me. What great Americans they are.

The Butler Family greeting Aaron at the airport in Monticello.
Photo Cred: Salt Lake Tribune 8/24/2017
Isn't "being a good neighbor" really what America is about? Isn't it about loving one another and uniting against hatred? Isn't it about helping and protecting and defending each other? So let's stop fighting and start being good neighbors. We have a lot to do internally, and there are people who need us globally, but if we simply start by taking care of  our neighbor--regardless of whether or not they believe the same things we do--we will get there!

Thank you to the entire Butler family. Your mansion in heaven is going to be enormous, and you deserve every single brick! In fact, knowing him, Aaron is probably building it for you right now.

The great Butler Family.
Photo Cred: Salt Lake Tribune 8/24/2017
Thank you, Aaron, for your selfless and inspiring life. You were a legend before, and now you are a true American hero. Thank you for spending your life trying to make the world a better place. Thank you for being my neighbor. Your life, along with thousands of others, is a sacrifice that will never be forgotten. Thanks to you, our flag is still there.

#landoftheFREEbecauseoftheBRAVE

Friday, August 11, 2017

The Ghana

So, I went to Ghana for 3.5 weeks in July.

I have now sufficiently recovered enough to share some photos of the events, which are too numerous to even begin to describe. I must be getting old. Exotic global adventures are no longer as appealing as staying home to watch my yard and garden die. But now I can add to the internet trove of white-Americans-going-to-Africa-and-posting-about-it, so that's a benefit.



The entire Reproductive Health squad. Fabulous crew. 
I went to research reproductive health, particularly contraceptive use* for an extra certification with my master's degree. 
The better half of the Reproductive Research Team ;)
Just kidding guys. We were all great. 


I keep telling everyone, "It was educational, but not in the way I expected."
Fairly typical classroom in rural Ghana. 
I learned a lot. I experienced a lot. I felt a lot. I met a lot of really amazing people. I saw a lot of poverty and pollution and problems. I ate a lot of chicken.
Before
After




















I can never eat chicken again.


Well, if this can't make it onto a Save the Children post I don't know what will!
This is on the soccer field/school behind our "hotel" where the local kids gather.
What a cutie!

I will never travel without my husband again. Good heavens, I have never had so many things go wrong in my life... and for those of you who are familiar with my history, that is significant. I've discovered that he is extremely lucky, so his presence tends to neutralize my bad luck and turn us into relatively normal people.

My luck with airlines is classically bad. Why on earth did I think it was a good idea to gamble and book United! (In all fairness, I had booked it before the #UA3411 incident. So when I did board the plane I felt like I was walking into a tunnel of doom...)

...I was.
#NeverFlyUnited
Since I missed my connection to Accra, United sent me
 to Vienna, Ethiopia, and then to Accra.
I will never fly on another United Flight again. EVER!!



This is my sweet Chicago airport friend, Bharathi.
We bonded during the SIX HOUR DELAY in the
Chicago airport to fly to Brussels. 



















After adding 20 hours of flying to my 18 hour trip, with 2 additional ten-hour flights back-to-back, I arrived in Accra. THANK HEAVENS the rest of the Utah people's Delta flight was also delayed so I was able to meet up with them. I've never been so relieved to see Dr. Benson as I was when I saw that he was standing right outside the Ghana customs gate. #TenderMercy #Iwasreadytodie

I will never take this wonderful country--with its good smells and reliable plumbing and passing lanes--for granted again. 

WE ARE SO BLESSED.



"Don't worry about bringing a poncho," they said. "It will be so hot there," they said.

Okay, this woman cracks me up. She saw us (white girls) and got so excited that she LITERALLY was running all around their hut, leaping and dancing around. She wanted a picture with us, so she tore off across some field to fix herself up and grab her scarf. She was ECSTATIC to take a picture with us!
I look at the picture later, and she isn't even smiling! It looks like we coerced her into standing next to us!
(Yes, I recognize that I look like a giant.)

This baby was less than a week old. So sweet!
That was the best part of our "research". We got to find all the moms and babies.
No, I didn't bring one home... though I was asked and the temptation was sore. :)

We quickly discovered that African kids absolutely love posing for photos for/with white people. 


We got to go to church! Some of us just couldn't keep our hands down.
Others insisted on gritting their teeth for the picture. 




Riding a tro-tro.
Initially terrifying, but actually doing it wasn't so bad.

Meet Emilee (pronouced "emily").
What a kindred spirit in the language of sarcasm!
Walking, single-file, through the Kumasi Central Market (the largest market in Western Africa).
Initially, not so bad. Actually doing it: terrifying.
We practically held hands to escape. 

So, pollution is pretty bad here. 
This man is quickly painting elephants for me :)
I took that painting home.
I learned to drive a hard bargain. #LifeSkills



I got to see two elephants.
I am choosing to focus on only that, not what I missed out on.
...*cough* 60-100 elephant herd... 
So, I didn't make the jump. 
I threw away nearly all of
my clothes when I got home. 

But the charming
Ghanaian guide helped me.
Elephant footprint.
My (dirty) foot. 


Awesome Utah girls!



On the way to the airport, we stopped by a rope bridge course!
#DroppedAnotherLuckyCoin
#LostAbout3OnTheTrip 
For the last day, they took us
to paradise to help us recover. 


My sweet hubby missed me.
I missed him.
(I did warn him, while taking this picture, that it would be shared.
He insisted on keeping this facial expression.)
*Oh, the irony!